Terminator Salivation

Гаврила вам не Терминатор: Гаврила зубы чистить мог
баллада о гигиене

The nuclear war has happened, everyone save a few were killed by the unleashed rage of
atomic fire...The survivors have formed a resistance as best they could - quite a sensible 
move, it seems.
Hardly anyone wonders what for - but the answer's simple - and somewhat unnerving.
The whole business about the war had one aim in its global sky-network mind - hygiene.
Nothing in the world is more important than fighting a ruthless machine in firm
certainty that your teeth are clean.

To hunt (and, presumably, munch) down humans skynet has built terminators: their hyper
-alloy combat chassis are the best means to implement the decisions of their silicon brains
(unless those've had a particularly bad experience with some substance which looks like a
pizza topping after severe overexposure to microwave heating), they won't stop until a
human is killed (or spectacularly injured, which is just about the same from a film-maker's
point of view), and, frankly, they don't give a damn about their teeth, which is an easy
thing to do provided they'd need an industrial strength wire brush at the worst of
times.
Humans hold every bullet dear, but the most valuable thing to be found on one resistance
soldier is a toothpaste tube (luckily, none are shown in the original movie*) .
The film makes a strong visual emphasis on futuristic target acquisition software - all
skynet ever had to do was to provide humans with enought fluorine toothpaste and then,
some time later, launch a few X-ray satellites to become able to trace the resistance down
with somewhat astonishing precision.

____________________________________
* some believe John Connor holds the key to salvation; we belive he holds a toothbrush
and hides it surreptisiously whenever he expects any attention .
One should also note that the leader's wearing a woolen sweater - since wool can be used
as a toothbrush in case of dire need